I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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