hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
You need Xanax blowdarts
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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