Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(559): View more from California

That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!

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(678): View more from Georgia

Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.

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(678): View more from Georgia

i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend

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(613): View more from Ontario

Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.

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(708): View more from Illinois

You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.

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(623): View more from Arizona

He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda

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(310): View more from California

hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?

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