GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
He has the fingertips of a God
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
