then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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