New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Randomize
