i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Randomize
