just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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