You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Randomize
