I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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