They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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