I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Randomize
