Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize