I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize