why didn't you poke me back
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Randomize
