"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Randomize
