i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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