it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Randomize