this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
