The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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