Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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