Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
