Will you blow on my dice?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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