she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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