If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
