Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
