i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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