Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Yo dont text me then not text me
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
