her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
