And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize