He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
