Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
