whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
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