Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
