we're blogging at a bar
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Randomize
