More tranny stories later!
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Randomize
