Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
