Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Randomize
