Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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