and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
