Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
false alarm. still invincible.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
