Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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