david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
