He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
