I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
How many fucks given?
0.12846
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
