i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize