saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Even the bartender felt bad for me
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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