dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
