he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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