You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
