So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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