She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
My dad is sitting where you rode me
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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